DEAR DEL,

IM 19 YEARZ OLD AND IM IN A RELATIONSHIP.I BEEN WITH HIM FOR 2 YEARS AND WE ARE IN LOVE AND HE IS READY TO HAVE SEX WITH ME.IM READY TO BUT IM A LITTLE NERVISE.WHAT DO I DO.

DEAR AALIYAH,

IT’S SO UNUSUAL THAT TWO YOUNG PEOPLE WAIT FOR TWO YEARS TO HAVE SEX!  IT’S NATURAL TO BE NERVOUS BUT YOU GUYS ARE IN LOVE AND I’M SURE HE WILL BE TENDER WITH YOU.  I ASSUME YOU ARE A VIRGIN.  IN ANY CASE, JUST TRY AND BE NATURAL AND LET HIM LEAD THE WAY AND THEN YOU JUST DO WHAT YOU FEEL LIKE DOING.  YOU’D BE SURPRISED WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOUR PASSION IS AROUSED!  GOOD LUCK AND LET ME KNOW HOW IT GOES.

SINCERELY,

DEL

Dear Del,

I meant this woman under unusal circumstances and from the very beginning I told myself I was not going to like her no matter what,even though she is the most beautiful woman I have ever seen and I’ve “seen” alot.Any way from the first moment I layed eyes on her my legs turned to jello,my heart felt like it was coming out of my chest,and I heard bells ,fireworks and it seemed every sound that was ever made by the earth.as these last couple of years have gone by and me fighting and hiding all my emotions with every fiber of my being, the feelings just keep getting stronger.Nobody knows anything except a few mutual friends.And they say I should say something.I’ve never had such strong feelings and really don’t know how to deal with them.I’m 43 and she is 40.I recently went back to college and she absolutely puts all the ‘college girls ‘ to shame. Not just by her looks but by her intelligence and her heart.I find myself always thinking about her.I’ve even called off work because I just could’nt deal with seeing her. And i’m not talking sexually,I just love looking at her eyes and her smile and hear her laugh.What I want to know is should I say anything and if so ,what and how??? or should I play it safe and keep my mouth shut??? I’ve been single for awhile and I don’t know if it’s worth the chance.Although I would gladly lay down my life for her. But she does’nt have to know how I feel ,does she? Anything would help. Thanks

Dear Michael,

First of all, why did you tell yourself  you weren’t going to like her???  Maybe because you were so smitten and were afraid to ask her out.  Of course you should say something.  Faint heart never won fair lady.  You must overcome your fears and ask her out.  You will never know if she likes you unless you do.  It seems to me that you have a great fear of rejection or commitment or both, but remember, nothing ventured, nothing gained.  Just don’t declare all your feelings right away.  See how she responds to you first.

Sincerely,

Del

Dear Del,

i’ve been friends with this guy for eleven months and we are real close friends.we spend alot of time toghether and i’ve grown to really love him.he’s not very open to his feelings for me but his actions and body language speaks something totally different.I want to take it to the next level but not sure if i should try right now. what should i do?

Dear Avis,

I don’t know what you mean by the “next level”.  But I would just show him by your actions that you are very into him so if he is shy that will encourage him to open up more to you.  In this world it seems that almost everyone is afraid to declare themselves first because they are afraid of being hurt/rejected so the one who has more confidence is usually the first to say “I love you”.  We women think it should be the man but that is not always so. If you do declare yourself be fairly sure that he feels the same way - otherwise, wait and see.  If you’re like me, I always want to know where I stand so I don’t waste my time if a guy doesn’t return my feelings.  Good Luck and keep me posted.

Sincerely,

Del